New Work Up at FRiGG, The Tehelka Festivus Miracle Extended Remix
Updated: Aug 4, 2020
1. FRiGG’s eagerly-awaited Law & Order Issue is finally up and live and kicking people in the jaw because it is very awesome. It has creepy dolls in it. This alone ups the awesomeness quotient significantly. I am soveryhappy to have a story in this issue called Notes Made in Connnection with the Disappearance of a Boy Outside the Tropicool Icy-Land Urban Indian Slum as Investigated by the Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.
2. The Tehelka Festivus Miracle continues to spread its tentacles of miracles even after the Festivus season has left the building. We are honored to receive photographic proof of this most haut and holy Tehelka Festivus Miracle which makes people smile and hold up magazines at the same time.
This louly lady once had jaundice and a pet shrimp called Caesar. She also lived in a “tree house”, which was really just a collection of leaves tied together with string which had no door and she lived in this thing and it caused her mother much grief and hyperventilation and missed heartbeats. We are pleased to see that not only is she holding the magazine very effectively, she seems to be in much better lodgings which actually have walls.
This handsome man once had dengue fever and does not like to be called Bopsie. We also know that he is an ex-DJ and that he is often mistaken for “that Telegu actor” though which Telegu actor, we cannot say. He is holding the magazine so effectively that it has caused the ends of his mustaches to curl up ever so slightly.
And this veryfabulous individual is Blaft’s very own Kaveri Lalchand. I’m not sure if she’s had any tropical diseases but I do know that she sings Bon Jovi’s ‘Blaze of Glory’ with an extraordinary amount of feeling and she once sent me this notebook that’s apparently made from elephant poo and I’m still not sure how I feel about that but anyway, she is smiling and holding the magazine very effectively at Charu Nivedita’s story, because we’re all one, big happy family at Blaft.
3. We are very pleased to have some work from The Artist Formerly Known as The Artist, who took my piece firang and painted it on this vase type bamboo type possibly not bamboo type vase type thing.
I think it is so very much the fine. More so because The Artist was going through a no-profanity phase at the time and must have struggled while painting words like ‘cowcunts’ on the vase type bamboo type possibly not bamboo type vase type thing.
4. Sometimes things just sound way better when you add a lot of guitar to it, case in point, this version of Boom Boom Pow. The same guy has done a metal version of Benny Benassi’s Satisfaction, which is also pretty awesome. There is also a good cover of Toxic but it sounds a lot like Static Lullaby’s version. Toxic is a song which I feel sounds so much better when it’s sung by a post-hardcore screamo fellow.
5. Last but definitely not least, apologies are in order. I would like to extend my deepest and most profound apologies to the people who came to this blog looking for-
a) free hottie in bikis- Is this some kind of biscuit porn? Or is it some kind of movement to free hot young things that are trapped in bikis? I wish I knew what a biki was. I really do.
b) good Lord cutting hair lyrics- The good Lord is not cutting hair on this blog. He is also not cutting hair lyrics, as far as I know.
c) shalini actor bybay fuck- Why? Why are you looking for a bybay fuck? Why?